Thursday, July 30, 2009

Success and failure

I was praying on my way to work this morning for some friends who are not well and others who are facing a difficult morning and for my kids. I'm sure there are no other people on the face of this planet that I love more and for whom I only want the best, to be the best mom I can be for them. And I was wishing that "divorced" was not an adjective that could be applied to me. It feels like a huge failure, a great big mark on the record of my life. I was telling God this very thing but knowing that He is as sorry about it (probably even more) as I am.

My friend Patty gave me this incredible book to read, "Better than my Dreams". I'm not even going to try to describe it - just get it and read it...a lot. This is what I read today:

"You may win awards and get fancy degress with letters to put by your name. You
may grow flowers that should grace the cover of Southern Living. Maybe your son
will become a senator.

But the tables can also turn the other direction. You may never reach your goals. Your garden may be come choked with weeds. Your children might grow up to disappoint you.

Neither picture - success or failure - is who you actually are if what really matters at the end of the day is this: you are a woman whom Jesus loves."

Once again, I'm amazed at God's ability to speak to my heart. It's like he knows what I'm thinking and sets up the answer before I can go looking for it! (lol)

So there might be a big black spot on the record of my life or maybe not. Either way, there is something more beautiful ahead which eclipses that and any other spots in the past or that will undoubtly appear in the future.

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